My Relationship with the Phone

I love technology and t admire the tremendous strides that have taken place in recent history to make our lives more convenient.  The TV and the Internet are some of the things that have had an impact on our lives for better and/or  worse (another debate for another time).  But amongst all these devices the one that strikes the most fear in me is one that has been around for all of my life and the lives of almost everyone alive today, the phone.  I don’t know why, but every time I hear my phone ring feelings of anxiety and paranoia surge through every part of my body.  I immediately begin to feel uncomfortable and tense, my heart rate immediately quickens and I begin to panic (No exaggeration).  Who is it? What do they want? Why are they calling?  Before I even answer the phone I am already a mess.  Once on the phone, I begin to pace, unable to sit still, cautious of every word that I am about to speak. Thanks to technology many of my fears are alleviated as I now know who is calling and in most instances I would rather let my voice-mail take the call.  But at home there is no voice mail and no caller ID.  With every ring the sense of anxiety grows.  Should I answer the phone? is it important?  I’ve come to rely on other means of communication such as text message and e-mail but I always wonder why I find it so much easier to write rather than to speak. I’ve lost communication with friends and family due to my inability to simply pick up the phone and make a call or answer the phone.  When communicating one on one things seem to be OK but there is something about hearing the voice and not being able to see the person that makes me very uncomfortable. It is easy to see someones response on their face but more difficult to assess the person when simply relying on their voice.

~ by oreogeek on September 21, 2008.